


Dream Big

by earlgreymanatee



Category: Deadpool (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Cunnilingus, F/M, Face-Sitting, Pegging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-25
Updated: 2016-02-25
Packaged: 2018-05-23 03:11:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6102904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/earlgreymanatee/pseuds/earlgreymanatee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"See, I told you your eyes were bigger than your asshole when you picked this out!"</p><p>One humble attempt at fixing that pegging scene</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dream Big

**Author's Note:**

> I think we were all disappointed by the pegging scene in Deadpool. I also think that everybody should rewrite that scene so that there are a hundred better versions. Here is just one example of what could have been, in a better world.

He grimaced as the dildo entered him, immediately knowing he had made a mistake. "Nope. No, no, no-"  
"Ok, hold on, I am going to pull out, ready?" He nodded and she slowly pulled her hips back and the top third of the dildo they had managed to fit in slid out.  
Vanessa sat back on the bed and said, "See, I told you your eyes were bigger than your asshole when you picked this out!"  
He still was leaning forward on all fours, recovering. "I know, I know, I just thought we should celebrate International Women's Day, and well, you fuck me in the ass all the time, I needed to do something to make it special!"  
Vanessa chuckled, "And your 'something' was to buy the biggest dildo the store carried?"  
"You know, every extra inch would represent how much more I admire and respect women...or something."  
Wade looked embarrassed that he had failed to live up to the challenge he had set for himself, but Vanessa was not bothered. The dildo he had purchased was impressive by any standards, almost as big around as Vanessa's wrist. When he showed it to Vanessa she immediately refused to ever try to fit it in her vagina. When he told her that he wanted her to use it on him, she was still skeptical (and rightly so, as it had turned out), but she and Wade always had fun trying new things, even if they ended up not working out, so she agreed to give it a shot. If she was being honest, she was not a fan of the look of it either- it was realistic, flesh-tone and veiny. It even had balls. Not really her style. She had always preferred her dildos to be non-realistic and considerably smaller.

"Hey, I think a regular old ass-fucking is plenty celebratory!" Vanessa said, climbing off the bed. "How about we just use the normal dildo? If your butt is still feeling up to it, of course."  
Wade perked up."Oh, fuck yeah. I didn't give myself an enema and spend the afternoon with a butt-plug in for nothing."  
She removed the large dildo from her harness and placed it on the bedside table. From the under the bed sex toy box, she retrieved her normal dildo: average sized, undetailed, and purple. Much nicer. She placed it in her harness, giving her hips a little shake so that it wobbled and making sure it was in the right position. She grabbed the bottle of lube off the bedside table and squeezed right onto the dildo and then spread it around with her hand. She positioned herself behind Wade and squeezed the lube directly onto his asshole.  
"Jeez that's cold. You are cruel, woman, not even warming it up in your hand first. It's like a being at the doctor's office"  
"Have you ever even had a prostate exam?"  
"No, all exploration of my prostate has been strictly informal, but people will get the joke."  
"I'm the only one here, babe," Vanessa said patiently,"Now, do you want me to fuck you or what?"  
"Yes, please."

She guided the dildo into him with her hand, then pulled it away, letting her hips take over. She rocked slowly back and forth, waiting for him to set the rhythm. After a minute or two, he started to really get into it, taking over the work of the thrusting and encouraging her with "harders" and "fucks" and "pleases" and "yeses" and occasionally strung together into "Oh yes, fuck me harder please, please, pleases." She held onto his hips, guiding him and matching his thrusts. Occasionally she ran her fingers across his back or gave his ass a slap of encouragement. When he couldn't take it anymore, he fell forward on his shoulders, face pressed to the side against the bed, ass up in the air, and reached his hands back to jerk himself off while she fucked him. They were increasing in speed and intensity of fucking, reaching a fever pitch as Vanessa held Wade's hips and jerked him back and forth on her cock with such intensity that there was a loud slap every time their sweaty bodies collided. Wade was not capable of coherent words anymore, and any encouragements had given way to loud moans. Just as Vanessa's thighs were starting to tire, Wade's moans became staccato shouts as he came. Vanessa slowed her thrusting as he rode out his orgasm. When he went still and quiet, Vanessa slowly pulled out and made a mental note that that night he would be sleeping on the side of the bed he just came all over.

Wade stayed bent over, ass in the air for a minute, before falling over on his side and rolling flat on his back, eyes closed. "You've done it. You've killed me. I am dead now. Put my cause of death on my gravestone: dead from being fucked to well. Wear something revealing to the funeral. Better yet, bring a date. For the funeral playlist? I was thinking-"  
Vanessa laughed, "You are pretty talkative for a corpse."  
Wade opened his eyes and smiled at her, "Well my body, my body may be dead, but this mouth will never die."  
Vanessa raised one eyebrow, "Is that so?"  
"Yeah, I'm just gonna keep talking, maybe I'll even start singing, yanno, just hashing out the songs I want played at my funeral. It's gonna drive you crazy. In fact, probably the only way I'd shut up..." he paused and turned to Vanessa with a faux-innocent look and batted his eyelashes,"...is if somebody made me." He glanced away demurely.

She sighed in an "oh, you" sort of way, before sitting up, pulling the harness off and tossing it on the floor, and throwing one leg over him and standing up on her knees, so that her crotch hovered above his face. He grinned broadly, like he had just won a prize. She lowered herself on his face, grabbing the headboard behind him as she did. He gave head with the same enthusiasm and stamina with which he talked. Perhaps it was because he talked so constantly that he was able to eat her out seemingly endlessly, never faltering in energy, without ever complaining about a sore tongue or jaw, a trait Vanessa had rarely encountered, at least not in men. She bent at her knees to grind herself against his face, forcing his head against the pillow. Between the ass-fucking and the face-riding, she was pretty sure she could cut squats out of her workout routine this week, her thighs were going to be sore enough as it was. She moaned a little, and felt him moan against her as well. She looked back over her shoulder and saw he was starting to get hard again, despite having made claims not a few minutes earlier of being completely spent. She swore, that boy could recover from just about anything. She knew she wouldn't last much longer, she had been so turned on fucking him, and the base of the dildo had been gently bumping against her while she was, so she started already half-way to orgasm. Supporting herself against the headboard with one hand, she leaned forward and grabbed the back of Wade's head, pressing him even harder against her. Their eyes locked while she came, thrusting against his face. 

Panting she let his head drop and dismounted, flinging herself onto her back on the bed next to him. He turned to look at her, grinning, mouth gleaming with her cum, but didn't say anything. Instead, he turned onto his side and cuddled up to her so that her arm was around him, and he was spooning her with his head on her chest. They lay quietly for just long enough that Vanessa had started to doze off when Wade said, "So what are we going to do with this thing?" looking at the dildo, the huge one, sitting on the nightstand, "Because, I'm thinking maybe dining table centerpiece? I think it would look lovely bedazzled."  
Vanessa looked at it thoughtfully, "I don't know, I thought I might keep it, for work. I might have a client who wants me to use it on them some time."  
"Geez, who would that client be, Mr. Fantastic? Wait, have you ever fucked Mr. Fantastic for work? Please say yes."  
She laughed, "No, no I haven't"  
"Yeah, he probably is getting plenty at home from the Invisible Woman. Do you think he ever uses his super powers during sex? Oooh, do you think she does?"  
Vanessa smiled sleepily, "I can't say I've given it much thought. Do you spend a lot of time thinking about superheroes fucking?"  
"What no, of course not," Wade said pointedly, "Thinking about superheroes fucking all the time? That would be super weird." He gave a meaningful glance over his shoulder away from Vanessa, before leaning forward to lay his face back onto her chest and start to fall asleep.


End file.
